A good volunteer is a happy volunteer

Exactly one week later and no journal entries. I knew site visit would be busy, but I do wish I had written more down… where to start? I traded my healthy status in for an illness, traded the illness in for silliness (late night water fights and debaucherous parties are good medicine), traded in silly for somber as we lost another trainee to ET¹.

Crystal was an agroforestry trainee, impressive with her agricultural knowledge, indispensable for her cynical wisdom and wit. She was not the first to throw in the towel, but she was the first volunteer I mourned with tears. Her departure was more shocking and sad than I would have expected. Unwelcome as it was, it prepared me for Doug’s announcement that he was ETing. Another environmental education volunteer going home. And then there were three.

I talked to both Crystal and Doug at length, offered them a listening ear, hashed out life goals, reexamined what PC service meant, pushed them to hang in a little longer… as much as I tried to convince them to stay, I’m glad I failed. By participating so intimately in their ET process, I realized two large truths:

Africa is not for everyone.
A good volunteer is a happy volunteer.

The latter truth is one I’m taking to heart, especially since my own happiness been less than effortless lately. I had so few expectations for my service, making disappointment rare if nonexistent. But after seeing what will be home for seneteyn il jaayat (the next two years) I realize expectations are unavoidable, understandable and thankfully adjustable. I started my training with a family in a small village nestled in the middle of Mauritanian nowhere. Inadvertently, my mind’s eye fabricated a similar location in which I would spend my service. Fittingly, Peace Corps chose an absolutely dissimilar location: an overwhelmingly huge, tourist-ridden city sans trees, family, rain or milk. My technical training in gardens, mudstoves and PACA anything² now seems ill-adjusted to urban life, as does my hard-won resilience to unpasteurized milk. Somehow, I must translate my skill sets and learn how to tend my “garden” vi iddeshra (in the city). This adjustment, though thoroughly vexing to my now disoriented mind’s eye, will occur given patience and time. I think. Inshallah.

I am definitely up for the challenge, especially having met my “counterparts” in Atar. Between Nouha, Muhammed Abdelahi (school director), Zeynabou at the Girls Mentoring Center (GMC) the Adrar PCVs and the promised support of wiser third-year PCVs from Nouakchott, I know I am in good hands. While a home stay might not be in my PC future, the Adrar PCTs have already bonded into a makeshift family, with Kris claiming the ridiculously endearing namesake “Poppa.” Regionally, plans are brewing for communal meals and oases vacations. What-will-I-do-spastic-self be damned. I am happily part of a solid group of volunteers who will brave the sandstorms and relish in camel sandwiches. Ijaazi-ne b’il kheyr (may God bless us).

---

1: ET stands for early termination. Peace Corps is a two year commitment, but occasionally a volunteer has reason to terminate his or her service early: an illness untreatable in country, the death of a relative, a better job opportunity, or, as is usually the case during training, the realization that Africa is not as doable as previously thought. It is a phenomenon approached with caution, disgust, shame, sympathy, and other unidentifiable emotions. ET is a way out, ET is a loss, the death of a fellow trainee, a poison that reduces our numbers, a rumor that reminds us of our own fears and vulnerabilities.

2: PACA stands for Participatory Analysis for Community Action. It is a Peace Corps approach to development that encourages communities to identify and mobilize against their own problems. The volunteer thus facilitates sustainable and self-directed activities executed by and for Mauritanians. Usually, PACA activities begin by assembling community members in manageable groups, e.g. local women, men, elders, or teachers, etc. and prompting them to examine local issues and solutions. PACA aims for a consensus of ideas and a unified action plan. Easily envisioned in a small community of a few hundred people, more than daunting in a city of 30,000.